I've been upgraded; I've gone digital ...

I knew something was up this morning, when my human woke me up from a lovely deep sleep on the sofa.  She picked me up and I could sense that something different was about to happen.  I could tell she was a little bit tense.

And then I found out why.

She put me in the box.

Now I know, us cats normally love boxes.  But I don't like this box.  It's very small & I can't get out.  It's made of plastic, so it's not very warm or comfy.  It's got a cage door across the front of it which makes me feel like I'm prison.  I can look out of it, but I don't like it.

And then when my human picks the box up, I feel all sick and shaky.  She doesn't carry it very steadily.  And then it gets even worse when we get in the car.  I hate being in the car.  I don't understand why my human goes out in it every day.  It's horrible.  It's not right to be moving when you're lying down.

But the main reason I don't like the box is because my human only ever puts me in it when we're going to the vets'.  And I don't like the vets.'  They always ending hurting me.  Sticking needles in me, or little sticks up my bum, or pulling at my mouth, or sending me home with horrible tablets to eat ... & I don't like it.  I do understand that it's usually for my own good though, because we usually only go there when I've been poorly or a little bit stressed and I've pulled all the fur out of my tummy.

But I wasn't poorly today.  And my tummy just now, is very furry; my human hasn't gone away & left me on my own for a long time, and so I've had no need to pull my fur out. It's all grown back ... I'm very proud of my furry tummy.  As long as my human never goes away again, everything will be fine.

So no; not stressed.  And definitely not poorly.  So why take me to the vets'?

Well ... it seems that my human took me to be upgraded.  I had a little microchip installed between my shoulder blades. My human says it's so that if I get lost, she'll be able to find me.  But that doesn't make any sense to me. Because if I get lost, the microchip is going to be lost too.  Because it's inside me, right?

Microchips belong to computers and things, so I think I've been upgraded, but my human doesn't want to tell me what it means I can do now.  I'm just going to have to experiment aren't I?  And find out.

It hurt me when they installed it.  It was like getting a needle.  I didn't cry though; at least not at the microchip.

Because what I haven't told you yet, is that I also had an injection ... & I did cry at that one.  I wasn't expecting it when the vet stuck a needle in my neck.  Nobody told me it was going to happen, so of course I got a fright.

My human said I had to have this injection because I keep fighting with all the other neighbourhood cats and she doesn't want me catching anything from them if they scratch or bite me.  I'm too fast for them though.  I've not been bitten or scratched by any of them.  And I don't intend to.  So my human doesn't need to worry.

I don't understand though how this will stop me fighting with them.  Me getting hurt by the vet isn't going to stop that is it?

I think my human's a little bit confused ...

Nice idea; but I'm not sure this is going to work human ...

I came in from outdoors this morning to a lovely surprise from my human ...


She'd bought me a lovely warm fleecy cushion which she's put on her desk.  It's in a lovely place because I can sit on it & look out of the window.  And my bum is much more comfy than just sitting on the hard desk.

I think the real reason she bought it though was so that I would lie peacefully on it whilst she worked on the PhD thingy.  If I was sleeping peacefully on a nice comfy cushion, I think she thinks that I'll not disturb her any more.

I'm not sure about that.

It was all going really well until I tried to lie down.  And then I realised that it's probably not going to work.  There's not enough room for me.  The stupid monitor is in the way.

Just look ...

That's no good is it?

I'll just end up with a headache.

My human moved things around on top of the desk to try & make me as comfy as possible, but I'm still not so sure about it.  She did say that if I'd lain the other way, my head wouldn't have gotten stuck like that.  But I didn't want to lie the other way.  I wanted to lie this way.

It was a nice idea of her ... if a little bit selfish too, because of wanting to stop me disturbing her.  But I'll forgive her for that.

She does try very hard to keep me happy ...

And look at this ...

Now that it's getting a little bit dull, my human has put her light on.  It shines right down on me.  It's like having my very own spotlight.

It's also nice and warm.  And apparently, or so my human says, it's a magic light which will stop me getting all depressed.  Something about it being a SAD lamp ... that doesn't make sense to me.  How would a sad lamp, stop me getting depressed, if it can't stop itself getting all sad?

And anyway, I don't think I'm going to get depressed.  Not whilst I've got such a lovely life with my human.

But I might just get a sun tan from sitting under this light ...

And look ... I did manage to get comfy eventually ... once my human had rearranged her desk a little bit to suit me ...

My human always tries her best to keep me happy & comfy ...

 She doesn't always get it right; but she does always do her best ...

What more could a little moggie ask for ...?

The PhD thingy wasn't so bad yesterday ...

Us getting ready to read

The PhD thingy wasn't so bad yesterday ...

My human spent all day yesterday reading through the interview transcriptions that she'd made from talking to counsellors and therapists.  She'd been talking to them about their experiences of working with clients who have eating disorders.

Eating disorders are another human condition that I don't really understand.  I'll write a blog entry one day all about my thoughts around them ... but not today.

No human; I'm not in the way

What was good about her reading through the interview transcriptions was that she didn't need to sit at her her computer.  She sat on the comfy living room sofa all day.

It's quite interesting this really ...

And I sat on her knee almost all day ... other than a couple of little trips outside for some fresh air and to stretch my legs.

In fact, we sat on the sofa for so long, even I got tired of sitting on the human's knee.

So, when she put one of the interviews thingies down on the sofa, I took my chance & went & sat on it. It was quite nice to just sit next to her for awhile.

And that's why I couldn't write this yesterday.  I was nowhere near the computer.

We've finished our Methodology chapter ...

Me and my human have worked very hard today.

Scrumpy lying on the PhD thingy

We've finished her Methodology chapter.  I still don't really understand what it is, but I think it's something to do with her having to write about how she's done her research over the last 4 or 5 years.  That's a long time isn't it?  It's even longer than the time I've lived with her ... I've only lived here for just over 3 1/2 years, so she started it way before I moved in.

From what she's told me, the cat she had before I moved in, Scrumpy, used to like to help her too.  I remember Scrumpy.  She was a tortie just like me, but she had a white tummy & white on her legs.  I remember when I first started coming across the road to sit on my human's doorstep (she nearly fell over me a couple of times!) and she'd open the door, and I'd see Scrumpy sitting inside.  Of course, I didn't know she was called Scrumpy then. I don't think we would have liked each other.  She certainly never let me go inside.  I was only invited in by my human once Scrumpy went to pussy cat heaven.

But I've gotten away from my point ... the methodology chapter.  It's finished.  And it's very comfy.

I'm not sure my human was very happy about me sitting on it, but it was still warm, fresh out of the printer ... how could I resist?

Me looking out of the window

I think I've upset her a few times (again!) today ...

It was okay at first, because I was happy, for a little while, to sit and look out of the window whilst she did some work.

But then I got a little bit bored.  And a little bit sleepy.  And I wanted a cuddle.  And so I squashed myself onto her knee.  She wasn't happy because she said it was hard for her to have to reach over me & type.

It can't have been that hard.  I'm not that big.  And anyway, it was really annoying for me, because everytime she moved her hands and fingers, I bounced!  And I got sick of the sound of the keys tap, tap, tapping away.

Ouch!  Keep still human!

And to be honest, it wasn't even that comfy.  Her knee was nice & soft & warm, in her nice little dressing gown.  But the table was very hard.  And there wasn't very much room on there for me at all.  And it wasn't nice to have my pretty little face squashed up against the table.

I'm just having a look at what you're doing

So in the end, I gave up. I got up.

But she still wasn't happy.  Accused me of getting in the way, sitting on her papers, and in front of her screen.

Well, excuse me human.  But I want some attention. Stupid PhD thingy always spoils things for me.

I gave up when I realised she really wasn't going to stop doing it.  So after a while, I went outside for a little bit.

Reading together

 When I came back in, she was sitting reading some papers, so I sat next to her & watched her as she read them.

If you can see, she was sitting in a different seat & she'd moved her computer chair next to it so that she could put her notebook on it & write notes as she read.

That's the chair I sat on.

I don't think she was happy.

I soon got bored & went off & had a little snooze.  I was in a bit of a huff with my human, and I wanted her to know that.  So I went & sat on my own in the living room.  I thought she would feel sorry for me & come & get me.  Come & play with me, or come & give me cuddles.  But she didn't.

PLEASE talk to me, play with me, love me ...

Too involved in the the PhD thingy to even care about me.

So I gave up that little ploy & went back into the study.

"Miaow, miaow, miaow" I kept shouting at her.

I got her up a few times to give me treats, to open the back door for me.

But still I wouldn't shut up, because what I really wanted was for her to stop working & come & play with me.

But she wouldn't.  Could you resist me if I was looking up at you like this?  Just look at those eyes ...

She was having none of it though.  And I could tell that the more I miaowed, the more annoyed she was getting with me.  And I didn't want to make her angry.

So I went off & had another snooze.  And this time whilst I was asleep, she got the Methodology Chapter finished.

Warm & fresh from the printer

                                                                                         

  She was just printing it out when I went back in.  

                                                                                               So when she put it down on the chair, it was still nice & warm, fresh from the printer.

It was very comfy for me to sit on.  But again, I don't think my human was very happy.  I don't think she meant for me to sit on it.  I don't think she liked that it got all creased just off the printer.

It's quite good

I had a little bit read of it.

But to be honest, I couldn't be bothered to read the whole thing ... 43 pages is a little bit long, especially on a Sunday afternoon.

But the little bit I did read on the front page seemed quite good.  I know she says she's still got a lot of work to do on it ... which means me being ignored again ... but it did seem good.

I couldn't understand it all.  Lots of big & strange words.

Snoozing on the Methodology chapter

I had a lovely little snooze on it.  

Again though, I don't think my human was happy.

What is it with her?!

I do like it though ...


.... & my human's not getting it back.  If she wants her own copy, she'll just have to print another one ...

Why aren't you proud of me human?

It seems that it's not just disturbing her PhD thingy that my human's not very happy with me about ...

Me, guarding my back lane from up on my wall

I've had a few fights this week.  It's not my fault.  The stupid cats keep coming into my space.

Take Sunday night ... my human was having a nice cosy little chat on the telephone with her friend, when this new white cat came onto my wall.  It was just asking for trouble wasn't it?  We had a bit of a stand off on the wall, staring at each other, glaring, bushy tails.  But it refused to leave. 

So I had to up things a bit.  I started yowling and growling at it, which was its cue to leave.  But the stupid thing didn't.  Instead, it started yowling and growling at me.  How dare it!

Well, that was it.  I saw red!  A quick hiss & I lashed out at it with my paw.  It wasn't quick enough ... I got a nice little pawful of fur.  I didn't hurt it ... it was just a warning.

Unfortunately, my human had come out by this time ... still on the phone to her friend ... & saw it all!

White cat turned and ran (as it should have done earlier) & of course, I went running after it.  My human was worried we were going to get into a big fight, and so she came out into the back lane ... in her bare feet.  

Of course, by the time she got to the top of the lane, white cat was sitting cowering under a car.  I was sat on top of the wall, my wall, glaring down at it, making sure that it didn't dare come out.

My human was a little bit worried.  She could see that I was okay, but I think she wanted to make sure white cat was too.  I don't know why.

Anyway, she went back home to get some Dreamies to coax me home and the white cat out.

Whilst she was away, I decided to swagger home.  I thought white cat had learned its lesson ... it wouldn't be back on my wall that night.  So I just went home, got my treats & snuggled into my human.  

She told me off though for fighting.  I don't know why.  I was just protecting her and I. She should have been grateful.  She should have been proud of me.

I had another little spat last night.  This time with a little ginger and white cat out the front. Stupid thing was sitting beside a car across the road.  When my human came to call me in, she realised I was just sitting on the windowsill ignoring her.  I had bigger things on my mind.  Staring down little ginger thing.  I know my human was worried I was going to go and have another fight. But I didn't need to.  This little one was sensible.  When it saw me stalking across the road, it knew I was in charge ... & off it ran.

There was another bigger fight too, that I thought I'd gotten away with.  My human hadn't heard / seen it happen ... & I wasn't going to tell her.  But our stupid neighbour just has.  She's told my human all about the yowling and growling, and hissing etc. etc.,  It was another fight I won though ... I lashed out at the cat, chased it down the wall & it ran off.

This picture is from a long time ago.  This cat dared to come right into my yard.  Look at the audacity of it!  He was only brave enough to come in & sit there though because he knew I was locked inside.  Just look at the size of my tail ... that's how angry I was about it.

 I'm quite proud of myself; 3 fights in less than a week with 3 different cats ... & I've won each & every time.

I don't know why my human's not happy about it? She should be proud of me, doing such a good job of protecting our flat, our back lane, our front street ... ?!

Leave the PhD thingy alone ... !!

My human's been sitting at her computer all morning ... & I'm tired of it.

I've tried everything to get her attention, but it's just not working today.  She won't be shifted from the computer.  I've had to sneak on just now whilst she's having her lunch.






Okay human; so what are we doing today?  What are learning or writing about?

Let me see ...










Right; I see what we're doing ...

Is this right?

I did all of those lines of the bottom of my human's paper.

I don' think she wanted them there, because she took them off.
I wasn't very happy about that.








Let me have a closer look at what you're doing  ...

Okay. Be like that.

Just keep on ignoring me. I don't know how you can though when I'm sitting right in front of you ... & I'm just being my usual gorgeous self.

Look; what's your problem?

You can see around me.

I just want to be with you human ...

But if you are just going to keep on ignoring me, then I'm going to go and have a look at the mess of papers and books you've scattered everywhere ... if I'm lucky there might be something interesting to read.

In the end I gave up.

There was nothing interesting to read.

My human didn't want me.

So I just went and sat on the chair, feeling all sad, lonely, dejected & sorry for myself.

It sometimes seems that she loves the PhD thingy more than she does me. 
 I'm sure that's not quite true; but it's how it feels sometimes ...

I'm not in the way ...

My human's been accusing me of getting in the way whilst she tries to work on her PhD thingy.

I have no idea what she means.  The work is up on the screen, and I'm down here.




See?  Not in the way at all!

I'm not sitting in front of the screen.  And I'm not sitting on the keyboard thing ... I usually get told off for doing both of those things.

I'd made a big effort to be not in the way ... & she didn't appreciate it.

I thought she'd like to have  my company.  And I wanted a cuddle.  She wasn't going to leave the PhD thingy, but I knew she'd like a cuddle from me, so I went to her.  The table wasn't even very comfortable to sit on, but I did manage to push my way into her arm.  

But look ... 

I had to keep looking up at her to try & get her to look at me & give me some attention.

  I get really annoyed with the PhD thingy sometimes.  I feel jealous if I'm honest.  Jealous that she spends so much time with it.  Time, that I know, could be better spent with with me.  And I'm sure she'd enjoy it more too.

When I realised I wasn't going to get any attention from her.  What has that PhD thingy got that I don't have?

It makes me think I must be lacking in some way ...

I don't think I can be though.  Because I'm a cat.  And us cats are just purrfectly perfect ....

I gave up trying to get her attention eventually & just went to sleep ...

But look at me here ... do you see how not happy I am with her?  And especially after she made me sit outside in the rain this morning ... you'd think she'd want to be nice to me to make up for it wouldn't you?!

It's about time she realised that I come first in this house ... & NOT the PhD thingy ...

I'm getting wet ...

Stupid, stupid human ... I'm cold & wet ... & not happy. And I've told her so.

She's been working away on her PhD thingy & I've been sat outside in the back yard in the rain.  When she first began working on it, I was lying in bed, but then I got bored.  I knew that she was busy & so wouldn't want to play with me.  I was going to go & ask her to open the back door, but I thought I'd be kind, and just leave her to get on with her work.

You see, I knew the window in the bathroom was open.  And I knew that if I jumped up onto the ledge, I could jump out of it, & get outside that way.  And so that's what I did.

But what I didn't know, before I got out there, was that it was raining.  And it was raining quite heavily.

I ran to the back door to go straight back inside ... & remembered it wasn't open.  Because I'd tried to be kind to my human by not disturbing her.

So then I was stuck.  I know I could have ran around to the front & sat on the window sill there ... now that she's moved all of the furniture around in that room, her desk is at the window & so she would have seen me easily. But I didn't want to run round.  I've have gotten even wetter.

So I jumped up onto the ledge outside our living room and sat waiting for her.

Come on human.  Let me in.  I'm getting wet ...

I was sure she wouldn't be long.  She usually drinks loads of coffee and stuff when she's working, so I thought it would only be a matter of time before she came through to make herself a cup or use her litter tray.

But she was ages.

And I was getting wet and cold ... and angry.  I wasn't at all happy.

What nearly made up for it though was when she did eventually come into the living room.  Her face, when she saw me sitting outside, when she thought I was still tucked up in bed was a picture!!  But then she laughed at me; which I didn't like.

She opened the door for me & let me in.  Which I was grateful for, but I was still really angry with her for making me sit outside in the rain for so long. And I told her so.  I gave her a right mouthful.  And I can miaow very loudly when I'm angry.

She knew I wasn't happy, but she told me it was my own fault.  She said that if I hadn't jumped out of the bathroom window (which I do know I'm not meant to do), I wouldn't have gotten stuck outside.

I don't agree.  It's definitely her fault.

She should have known that I needed the back door opened.  


But anyway, I'm happy again now.  She gave me some Dreamies and I'm tucked back up in bed

& I'm not jumping out of the window again today ...

Teeth to make a dentist proud ...

See; this is why the rest of cats run away from me. I mean, would you like to be on the receiving end of these teeth?

                           

These teeth would make any dentist proud ...

Queen of my back yard ...

My human knew I was up to something when she looked out of the window & saw me sitting on our wall, looking over into our neighbours' yard ... with my big, bushy tail.

Her ears & nose aren't as clever as mine. You see, I'd heard & smelled another cat in next doors' yard. He was trying to be clever & sneak into my yard. I think he'd thought that if he jumped over from next door, instead of coming the usual way along the walls, I wouldn't notice.

Well, how wrong was he?! Doesn't know me at all. I'll not let any other cat into mine & my human's yard.

I sat up here just watching him for a while. And he kept looking at me. And then he got a bit cocky ... as those stupid Toms often do. He started heading over towards our wall, & I wasn't having any of it ... so I jumped down into the neighbour's yard.

I felt a little bit sorry for my human because I knew that she had no idea what was happening. And as Tom & I faced each other off & we started yowling & hissing at each other, I knew my human would be a little bit worried about me. She doesn't need to worry though cos I'm always okay. I know how to take good care of myself ... & our yard. I'll keep her safe.

Anyway, Tom soon realised I wasn't going to budge; he wasn't going to get the better of me ... & so off he ran.

One I was sure he was gone, I jumped back up onto our wall so my human would know that I was safe ...

I sat there for a while, just to make sure he wouldn't dare come back.

And then I moved round the wall & got myself comfy, just sitting here feeling pleased with myself ... 

                                       Queen of my Back Yard ...